Wheredidjengo's Journals

this is going to make no sense AT ALL.

hello. so it's 6:10am, i haven't slept since what feels like THE DAWN OF TIME, i'm through with drawing/painting my nails/founding clubs with people over Twitter/ listening to MCR B-sides SO to try and destroy my last brain cell, thus sending me into a coma (which is the next best thing to sleep) i figured i'd write a journal. this isn't going to make any sense because, and i'm no expert, but i feel like i'm in the first stages of some kind of psychotic "episode" 'cause of the caffiene in me, lack of sleep and fumes from the nail polish remover heading for my brain.

SO, stuff has happened lately, i'm sure of it. i've just had 2 weeks at home, getting looked after by my parents who're totally cute when i'm back from uni and ask me things like "which famous people have you seen in london lately?" and "did you enjoy your fall out guy pop concert?" yeah, i love 'em.

i think i just lost the ability to type in full sentences, so bullet points.

i'm back at my flat in london now
i'm on my own
my flatmates clearly hate me
my radiator keeps making the noise like The Grudge
maybe that's why i can't sleep
my blackberry keeps pretentiously "updating security software"
and i'm like "YOU'RE A PHONE!"
and it's like "I'M GOING TO TURN ON AND OFF FOR THE NEXT HALF HOUR WHILE FLASHING MY LED AT YOU AND NOT TELLING YOU WHAT'S WRONG!"

6:30am now, shower time, then out for the day.

i hope i'm only this nuts typing things down. if i talk like this to people in shops i'll be socially shunned forever.

best. conversation. ever. ("no one except fat bald men have the neck rolls!")

You know, I don't, I dream /* says:

is it possible to lose weight from your head?

cause my glasses are falling off more often than usual

Jen! says:

haha no but it's possible to have bad fitting glasses

fat people don't have fat heads usually (not that I'm saying your fat, it's just... people in general don't get fat heads...)

But imagine that.

if you gained fat around your skull!

You know, I don't, I dream /* says:

you can get fat heads though

i think you can anyway!

Jen! says:

well some people get pure rolls at their back of their neck

You know, I don't, I dream /* says:

i know but get that too!!!

if i didn't have hair i'd totes have it

Jen! says:

oh my god you so would not

You know, I don't, I dream /* says:

no i actually do! lol!

Jen! says:

no one except fat bald men have the neck rolls!

You know, I don't, I dream /* says:

when i tilt my head back i get harsh rolls

i'll show you tonight

Jen! says:

oh wait ME TOO!

You know, I don't, I dream /* says:

SEE!

Jen! says:

this is a nightmare

You know, I don't, I dream /* says:

i know! we can never go bald!

WHAT IF IT COMES INTO FASHION!?

WHAT IF VOGUE SAYS IT!

Jen! says:

OH MY GOD! WHAT IF MADONNA TRIES TO ADOPT A NECK ROLL!?

THEN EVERYONE WILL HAVE ONE!

i love my friend(s) we're going to hang out later, so we can bring the lulz in real life too :D

Who reckons i can convincingly stand on a busy street and lie to people about a trash can being art work? (W.T.F)

check out my assignment due for next semester. it's actually the most hilariously unacademic thing EVER. BUT IT'S FUCKING AWESOME and i figured the buzznet kids like to "think outside the box" (plz note irony thnks) so this must be right up your street :-P . Section (3i) is clearly the winner in terms of awesome. check out the other parts too...;

"SECTION THREE: Random Shit

3a) Design a word that refers to itself. (e.g. mi_sing, mexid-up, infinityyyyyyyâ�¦ Dollar$, quest?on, 2welve, Subtra_t, Exca!m, Â£ound note, Tw*nkle, Snowdr*p, Assh*le, %ercentage, @ddress) [1 word]

3b) Design your own â�œrock starâ� pseudonym in one word only (e.g. like Madonna, Sting, Elvis, etc) [1 word]

3c) Write a meaningful sentence without using the letter â�œeâ�. [13 words]

3d) Invent a tabloid Headline (e.g. Freddie Star Ate My Hamster; Man Saws Leg off for Bet; The Queen Resigns, Brown becomes King; Genetics Shock: Grandmother at 16.) [6 words or fewer]

3e) Write a Lonely Hearts Advert for your real/imaginary pet. [15 words]

3f) Invent a new physical gesture. Photograph it and describe what it means. [20 words]

3g) Write a short, serious statement to the Prime Minister made up entirely of song lyrics (Reference the songs and artists). Send it in an e-mail. (Credit to those who recieve a response). [50 words]

3h) Write down 10 ideas for wasting time. [100 words]

3i) Curate a Design Exhibition

It is your job to curate a Design Exhibition in real life, in your chosen location around the centre of London (postcode areas W1, SW1, EC4). You must provide a catchy title for the show, explain the idea/thinking behind the show, say which venue/site you have chosen and why, describe the exhibits (n.b. THE ITEMS YOUR CHOOSE TO EXHIBIT MUST BE PIECES OF JUNK FOUND ON THE STREETS THAT YOU WILL ATTEMPT TO PASS OFF CONVINCINGLY AS ART TO THE PASSER-BY), and include a single page layout for the catalogue advertising your show. [300 words]

Key Text:

Feo, R., and Hutado, R., (eds.) (2008) Nowhere/Now/Here, Laboral, Centro de Arte y Creacion Industrial

Overall word count for this section: 500 words"

This is for my "Design Context and Lateral Thinking and Application" class. It's the highlight of my week. Now you see why.
(3i) is going to be insane.

x

i'm warning you now; these are going to be lame as a duck... who's lame.

10 facts about me! re-tag 10 people and whatnot. h'okaaay.

1. i'm always in the wrong place at the wrong time. like today (to cut a long and slanderous story short) me and my massive pothead friend were at a train station in central london heading down a massive escalator, we're over halfway down then suddenly he's like "OHSHIT!" because there's police with a team of sniffer dogs at the bottom and he's carrying some 'herbal leaves' (?!) in his pocket. there was a situation wherein he grabs me and pulls me back up the downwards escalator - barrelling over some old lady with shopping in the process trying to get back up, falls over and nearly takes me down with him while i'm shouting 'LET ME THE FUCK GO!' in front of a bunch of kids because i'm totally innocent in all of this. nightmare. we got away though. anarchy. but an incident like this happens to me at least once a day. i just attract disaster.

2. i really like museums. if i'm not out destroying my bank balance in shops i'm probably at a museum. they're just awesome - i love learning because i'm a huge nerd. like, i freaked out in the National Gallery the other day because of their insane Da Vinci exhibition that i forced two of my friends to come with me to and consequently ruined their enthusiasm for life and everything else in it.

3. there's only really 4 things in life that annoy me, i don't get mad easily everything else is either 'kinda cool' or 'i don't care.'
- people who use the phrase 'postmodernism' to get away with stripping in front of our class as an art presentation. (yes, that happened. *shudder* SUPPRESSED MEMORIES!)
- Bono from U2
- people who take themselves too seriously and express it in the form of arty photographs.
- rancid milk.

4. i really hate meeting 'famous' people. i actively avoid it at all costs because i'm terrifed they won't be as awesome as they are in my mind.

5. i buy into hype pretty easily. i always need to get the new this, the new that and the "next-version-that's-shockingly-similar-to-the-last-one-so-what-was-the-point-of-making-this-one" of everything. (everything except the new iPod, that is. i mean - seriously apple. sort yourselves out and design something practical. thnks.)

6. i like feeling insignificant. not in a 'omg no one cares! *sulk*' kind of way, but the way you feel when you stand in a huge crowd or next to a massive skyscraper or something.

7. i'm currently addicted to the most hardcore candy bars in the world. get this -

vodka flavoured lollipops with a real scorpion inside. i'm not kidding - they actually taste AMAZING. you get them in selfridges department store. i bought wholesale. nomnom.

8. my life long ambition is to run towards someone on a train platform through smoke and steam. because i watch terrible movies and base my life on them. obviously.

9. i am awesome at balance games. probably something to do with me being dead little and low centre of gravity or whatever but i totally OWNED my 6ft+ friend Tyler on the tube when we play 'let's stand on one foot and see who's the first to fall over' because, did you know, i'm actually 6 years old?

10. if i take a picture of you, then you say "let me see!",rip the camera out of my hands, look at the picture i just took then say "facebook it" i will be forced to shove something up your nose.

Ok so anyone who managed to stick this one out fill it in yourself but don't forget to link me so i can read yours because they're 100x more fascinating than me reading my own over and over :D

x

LOL sara (xblanksface)

xheyjenx (01:37:39): true. but hey, ever since the terrible events of saturday where i got Â£75 out of my bank and gave it to some random hobo then... yeah.

xheyjenx (01:37:46): maybe i don't need to spend....

xblanksface (01:39:07): i can only hope that you are implying that your concert ticket was Â£75 and pete wentz was the random hobo.

ILY LOL.
x

my afternoon.

Vodafone Mobile "HELP" Support: Hello, can I help you?
Me: Hi, yeah - I've been trying to connect a call to Thailand off this phone and it's saying the call's restricted. Is there anything you can do about it?
Vodafone: Have you made sure the device is switched on to make the call?
Me: Uhm. Yeah....
Vodafone: Ok, one moment - I'll put you through to our international call support.

23 MINUTES 16 SECONDS LATER.

Vodafone: Hello, have you made sure the device is switched on to make the call?
Me: *headdesk*

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.
*foetal position*
x

if i'm going to be a twitter whore...

then why not get this page moving again?
:D
xx

ps. this is massively optimistic for 1:30am but we'll see.

:D

Checkin' Innnn.

Hey :)

i'm back home for this weekend so i've got some time to do some more painting which i'm pretty excited about 'cause i'm going to try and do some closeups of peoples faces IN PAINT (homg, there's basically no way this can end well.)

apart from that, nothing's up this weekend except i've started selling some of my essentially un-used shoes i've had for over a year just on display because they're pretty and sparkly and i'm scared i'll wreck them if i wear them out. i need the money so if anyone wants purple/silver/black/pink/white pvc Nikes/Converse/Supras/Pumas then just ebay search them and they'll be around.

/ plug.

anyway. let's paint peoples faces on canvas and BRING THE LULZ (almost as much as these two).

hahahaha.

a small ornithological anecdote.

This pigeon jumped on my train just before it left.

Took a seat (see picture).

Pecked at a copy of the Daily Metro and actually TURNED A PAGE.

Attacked a lady as she was trying to get off the train and physically blocked her exit out the doors.

Shit everywhere.

Then got off at my stop.

I wish my head could swing full circle in a vertical plane.

Honestly the America's Suitehearts video just killed my brain, because yesyes, I am 3(?) days late on it's release but in internet terms that's around 50 billion years late on breaking news and I should probably be hung, drawn and quartered by a flock of angry Overcast Kids for being unaware this cinematic masterpiece was available to watch.

I think it's probably amazing in a way in which it reminds me of a phase I went through when I was 4, 5 or some other impressionable age (15) of thinking life would be amazing as a cartoon version of myself. Colourcolourbrightflashingthings is pretty much the key in getting me to sit through an entire music video, that along with fantastic head-wear and altogether terrifying makeup and this video didn't hold back in any of those areas. Kudos.

I could probably say something more about this video, except I only really catch flashes of it 'cause at every chorus I feel the need to inexplicably sing along dramatically, (eyes shut, powerballad style arm movements) as if I'm standing on top of a mountain, by a windy shore or in front of an accelerating bus with no means of escape and want to go out swingin'.

Almost completely unrelated did anyone notice that Mr.W looked disturbingly like the Spirit of Jazz from The Mighty Boosh? HAVE WE EVER SEEN THEM IN A ROOM TOGETHER?

Anyway - thank you for making sure I have cracked out dreams tonight :)